THE DAY THAT WAS….

On December 6, 2006, I walked down the aisle with my best friend and companion of four years amidst all celebrations and loud cheers. I was standing besides him, coy as ever, waiting to embrace the joys of married life. I could see the joyous face of my mother, his parents and lots of well-wishers.

After all the celebrations were over we retired to our abode. We were to take a flight the next morning for our short honeymoon trip of three days to Goa. After this trip, we were to fly back to Mumbai to attend his cousin’s wedding and then leave on the following day for our next trip to “Gods Own Country-Kerala”. The next morning we left for our honeymoon amongst all the crying and sobbing. Though initially I was a little sad about leaving my mom behind, later I began having a gala time there with all the water games and sports and the beautiful Goa locales.

After three days of pure bliss, we left for Mumbai. We reached his place around nine at night. I was tad nervous initially since this was the first time I was actually going to be put up at his place with all his people around and most importantly without my mom. Most of his relatives were still around due to the marriage which was on the next day. Towards midnight most of the guests had left for their respective homes and I was left with my parents-in-law and husband. My father-in-law, a true gentleman was not keeping well for the past three months and on the day of my marriage too was in a real bad shape. He called me next to him and held my hand. He got a lump in his throat as he was thanking my mother who single-handedly conducted my marriage in such a grand manner. He said he has never been so happy before and the marriage was more than what he expected. Those were his last words to me and then he retired to bed. I went into my room with my husband. We began to unpack our bags and prepare for the marriage which was on the next day. I saw my father-in-law go inside the rest room. After about 20 minutes, I told my husband that father was inside for a long time. He said that it was quite common since and all of them were used to this. After about 40 minutes I started panicking and asked my husband to check on him. My husband went and knocked at the door. There was no response but we could hear the water flowing. My husband became hysterical and he started pounding on the door. That’s when my mother-in-law woke up and came running. She fainted when she heard that father was not responding. Eventually my husband had to break the door open. And the next thing that I saw changed everything for me from that moment. I saw my father-in-law lying in the pool of water with his eyes all gone up and saliva drooling from his mouth. His body had become cold and he was not even breathing. I was too stunned to react to anything. It was as if I had lost my senses. Me along with my husband together pulled out the heavy limp body and placed it on the floor. By this time my husband was in tears and my mother-in-law wasn’t even responding to anything. With the little knowledge that I had, I started pumping his heart. But it was too late for all that. I immediately called up my brother-in-law who stays nearby and asked him to rush with a doctor. But we had realised by then that it was too late for all that. My father-in-law had passed away. I still wanted to be a little optimistic and wait for the doctor to come and give his verdict. By then I started calling up my brothers desperately. I was not even crying since I was too shocked to understand the gravity of the situation. In the next ten minutes the doctor arrived and pronounced him dead. This was at 12.30 at night

That’s it. I fell down on the floor in the state of shock. I saw my world collapse in front of me. By then his daughters arrived and chaos and screams rented the air. I ran inside the bedroom and fell into my husbands arms. I didn’t know what to do. The practical person in me was dead and I blamed myself for what happened and was sure that people too were going to say the same. My husband hugged me an told me that its not my fault. Father was always ailing. He tried to console me but of no use. By then people started filling in and I was lost in the crowd. I sat there at the edge of the bed staring at the ground in shock. I didn’t speak a word. I didn’t even realise that the room was filled with ladies who were crying and my mother-in-law and sister-in-law were on the bed, crying their hearts out. I didn’t realise anything. I was brain-dead. I could just see my marriage collapse right in front of me. My best friend-my husband going away from me. I had imagined scenes of people accusing me of being jinxed and bringing ill-luck to the house. Right at that very moment, I saw my childhood friend walk in and sit besides me. The moment I saw her, I collapsed in her arms and for the first time burst out crying. I have still no clue how many hours I cried after that. All I know was I was given some tablet to calm me. I woke up somewhere in the afternoon and realised that my mom was sitting besides me. I had not even realised when my mother came. I ran to her, hugged her, and started crying. I told her to take me away from there. After a troubled childhood without my father, this was the last straw. I asked her why does this happen always to me. Why can’t I be happy?? But my mother very calmly told me that now you have to be a responsible woman and take care of your husband and mother-in-law. She pointed in the direction of my husband. I saw him sitting there totally unlike him - quite, subdued, sitting against the wall. My mother told me that you have to become strong for the man u love so much. The moment I saw him that way, all my tears vanished and I could feel some energy seeping into me. I mustered up all the courage and decided that I can’t afford to lose my nerves now. This house needs me. I started preparing for the rituals that were to follow at the same time take care of my mother-in-law and husband. I had a last look at the henna on my hand which was still fresh from the marriage that took place only three days back. The next 15 days that followed, were a nightmare. These are the days which are supposed to be the best days of your married life. And here I was cooking for all the guests in the house, serving umpteen numbers of teas and coffees for the people who were coming in and cleaning up the house. I never thought that I would ever be able to do that. But that one moment when I saw my father-in-law lay motionless in front of me turned me into a woman - responsible woman. Life was never the same again. There was gloom in the house for the next one year. I had no choice but to go along with the tide. The only strength that I had was my husband. But those lovely days and those lovely dreams all vanished without a trace…..